Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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