We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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