so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
lol hangovers are for mortals.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Randomize