She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
