operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
