More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Randomize
