so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
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We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
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slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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