My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
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