Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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