Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
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