I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
Randomize
