what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Randomize
