you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Randomize
