dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
he puts the penis in happiness.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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