Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize
