dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
