Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Randomize