Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
