I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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