it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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