The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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