is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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