No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
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