I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Randomize
