drinking out of a sandbucket again
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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