Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize
