Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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