I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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