why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
ttyl tear gas
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
