just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize
