honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
