Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize