I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
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