I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
