it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
