So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Dude my roommate just peed out the window