I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
