In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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