It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Randomize