So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
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