I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
