Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
