ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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