Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
