I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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