and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize