I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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