I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
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