I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
