Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Randomize
