He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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