you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
